Comment to the comments on T-Bella's post

Thanks so much for your comments and encouragement. I'll admit I need them, and your prayers!

You know me Mom, I am going to prepare the heck out of it!!! Hoping it helps somewhat at least!

As I tucked her in tonite, she prayed "Jesus, let me, just let me stay here, where I belong. Let the judge say that he believes I am better off with this family. Tell him that I need brothers and sisters. And I need my mama. Amen." Tears of confusion sting more than tears of sadnes. I was not confused earlier. Sad, yes, but not confused. I knew what was happening was right. And now?? Now what?

Toni, you know I never would've though I would be albe to do this. There are so many thing He has taught me over the last 3 years, places he has brought me that I could've sworn I would never be. Regret, depression, fear, doubt, guilt, confusion, despair, selfishness, anger, sickness, and the place I was I would not wish on the worst of enemies. But with it all I learned that I had to dilligently seek Him, and when I did, every morning, the peace slowly returning and the fog lifted. I began to see how obviously I was not where God wanted me to be. Seeking and reading and learning gave way to change in my health, understanding and contentment, peace and joy, a passion to share this wonderful home I originally detested for many seasons, to bring Him glory, desire for change, a 'no matter what' attitude towards what or where or who He has for us. I still cannot tell you how it happened so I challenge you to go there. Just start the foster care process and see what the Spirit does! I am so very excited for you, Reed and Anna.